How is your life going today? How contented do you feel? How much to you resist what is? While friction turns a grain of sand into a pearl, the constant friction of resisting what is makes for a pretty painful life.
Did you ever hear the “what you resist persists”? What I am referring to here may be somehow linked to it, but where I have experienced the most pain in my life has been when I have fought reality. Sounds funny to say it like that. For most people where this has been the worst, is in personal relationships. Mostly love relationships. Girl loves boy – boy loves girl. Boy stops loving girl. Or girl stops loving boy. Boy or girl resists reality and suffers.
What I have finally come to see is that when I resist what is, I am living in La La Land. Fantasy world. Imagining that reality is not reality.
Have you ever done that? What this tendency indicates is simply that we need to grow up. To see reality as it is. To see that no it would not be “happy ever after”. No you would not experience real happiness with someone who does not want to be with you. No you can’t change someone. They may change, but it’s not certain. It may never happen. And if you become more mature, grown up, you will not waste your time waiting for someone to decide if they like you or love you. The Italians have a quote ” Meglio sola che male accompagnata”, or better alone than with the wrong person.
What are you resisting in your life? Have you become a people pleaser in the hope that you will be liked or loved? Have you made it your life mission to prove that you are lovable? That happiness is not for you? Stop. Look around you. I am certain you know people who are less than perfect and are adored by their partner. Or who don’t have to give gifts to their friends to be liked.
If you are ready to become more self-confident, mature and self-loving, but you are not too sure how to go about it, work with a coach. Call me at 613-744-1538 during regular weekday business hours (Eastern Time) and we will schedule a time to discuss how you can change your life and have more happiness.